What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
