is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
