there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
