what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
