i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
