Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize