My hand turned me down
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
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My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
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He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
The power of my boobs compel you
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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