Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
