Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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