How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
