6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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