I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
