did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I think I am morally bankrupt
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
