i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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