I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
