that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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