I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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