u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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