I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
