last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
farters have to be the big spoon...
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize