My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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