What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
