Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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