no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Randomize