Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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