i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
