God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
