I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize