end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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