I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
