Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
