So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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