I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
