singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
