He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
