3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
