I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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