i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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