Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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