Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
