I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
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sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
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I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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