She's JV to your varsity
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
