Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
