just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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