Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
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