Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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