First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize