her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
