DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
