i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I think your dad took our porno
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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