xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize